A Season of Change

Lots of things happening in my spirit. Change. It makes my spirit want to scream and bring out the claws but I know in my heart change is what is needed. It brings dependence on God right smack in front of your face. We always need to depend on God but boy do we know it in the midst of change!

We are currently looking for a home for our Ruger dog. This breaks my heart. He’s my baby dog. Baby dog is like my kid! Aye, pray for me as we go through the season of no longer having a dog! I know we can’t keep him and that he would be much happier at a home with other dogs and kids but it still doesn’t make it easy!

Yesterday I started counseling to process the emotions of the loss of my twin before birth. Yes, I said it….before birth. I understand that this can be hard to understand why I would need such counseling given I have no memory of my twin but our cells have memories and bonds were made in the womb. It’s time to start healing and time to move forward. This is something the Lord laid heavy on my heart and so if he says it needs to be dealt with then the dealing I will do. I am excited and nervous at the same time. I know there will be like mountain air and sunshine on the other end of this journey.

Blake and I have been praying about some things financially. I really don’t want to discuss on here what that is but I would totally welcome some prayers ;) Thank you in advance.

The Lord has also laid it on my heart to pray for a promotion. I am not sure what this promotion looks like but I am excited for it. This could mean a spiritual promotion, a financial promotion, an actual job title promotion….it could mean several things. While this is exciting the thought of being taken away from my comfort zone makes me a little nervous.

Through all this change and potential change the Lord has been good to whisper in my ear each and every time I freak out that He’s got this! “I’ve got this!”, “Don’t worry! I've got you!”…. He has even gone as far as to have others speak these words over me without me evening sharing that the Lord has already told me this. He even reminded me of Psalm 31! I a beautiful Psalm written for when we are stressed and need to depend on him!

Psalm 31

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

1 In you, Lord, I have taken refuge;
    let me never be put to shame;
    deliver me in your righteousness.
2 Turn your ear to me,
    come quickly to my rescue;
be my rock of refuge,
    a strong fortress to save me.
3 Since you are my rock and my fortress,
    for the sake of your name lead and guide me.
4 Keep me free from the trap that is set for me,
    for you are my refuge.
5 Into your hands I commit my spirit;
    deliver me, Lord, my faithful God.

6 I hate those who cling to worthless idols;
    as for me, I trust in the Lord.
7 I will be glad and rejoice in your love,
    for you saw my affliction
    and knew the anguish of my soul.
8 You have not given me into the hands of the enemy
    but have set my feet in a spacious place.

9 Be merciful to me, Lord, for I am in distress;
    my eyes grow weak with sorrow,
    my soul and body with grief.
10 My life is consumed by anguish
    and my years by groaning;
my strength fails because of my affliction,
    and my bones grow weak.
11 Because of all my enemies,
    I am the utter contempt of my neighbors
and an object of dread to my closest friends—
    those who see me on the street flee from me.
12 I am forgotten as though I were dead;
    I have become like broken pottery.
13 For I hear many whispering,
    “Terror on every side!”
They conspire against me
    and plot to take my life.

14 But I trust in you, Lord;
    I say, “You are my God.”
15 My times are in your hands;
    deliver me from the hands of my enemies,
    from those who pursue me.
16 Let your face shine on your servant;
    save me in your unfailing love.
17 Let me not be put to shame, Lord,
    for I have cried out to you;
but let the wicked be put to shame
    and be silent in the realm of the dead.
18 Let their lying lips be silenced,
    for with pride and contempt
    they speak arrogantly against the righteous.

19 How abundant are the good things
    that you have stored up for those who fear you,
that you bestow in the sight of all,
    on those who take refuge in you.
20 In the shelter of your presence you hide them
    from all human intrigues;
you keep them safe in your dwelling
    from accusing tongues.

21 Praise be to the Lord,
    for he showed me the wonders of his love
    when I was in a city under siege.
22 In my alarm I said,
    “I am cut off from your sight!”
Yet you heard my cry for mercy
    when I called to you for help.

23 Love the Lord, all his faithful people!
    The Lord preserves those who are true to him,
    but the proud he pays back in full.
24 Be strong and take heart,
    all you who hope in the Lord.

Praise you Jesus that you are in control. I thank you for the change that is to come. Even if the means there will be moments that it will stretch and grow me out of my comfort zone!